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New Dads: What I Learned On Paternity Leave

Photo by: Working Mother Editor

Taking Paternity Leave

Father’s Day (June 21 this year) is a beautiful time for celebration and uniquely special for new dads. Unfortunately, many men aren’t eligible for or don’t take much paternity leave when their new baby arrives. Nearly two thirds of full-time U.S.

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“A baby can really change who I am.”

“The number one thing I learned is how little I knew about babies. I realized how really little they are at first, how fast they grow, how hard the first few weeks can be on a new mother and the right technique to shush and settle a baby. I learned how hard it is to navigate friends and family who all want to be close to you, but also how to give my wife and I space with our new one. Ultimately I realized how a baby can really change who I am.”
Fred Cibelli
Principal, EY
New York, NY

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“Any thought that paternity leave would be ‘time off’ was way off.”

“It’s my first child, so any thought I had that paternity leave would be ‘time off’ was way off. In that time, I quickly learned that caring for your child was truly a 24/7 job, and it did not just start when you got home from work. I also learned that a father can hold his child for a lot longer than expected!”
Alan Numsuwan
Marketing Leader for Booz Allen Hamilton Commercial Solutions
Jersey City, NJ

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“I fully grasped how long it takes to do seemingly simple things.”

“As the father of two girls who are just 14 months apart, I am extremely thankful that my company offers a generous paternity leave to new dads. What taking the leave made me realize was how important it is to help our family establish a routine before heading back to the office. I fully grasped the length of time it takes to do seemingly simple things. The time off allowed me to fully invest in our new arrivals’ first days.”
Greg Phillips

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“I gained confidence in my ability to care for our newborn.”

“My wife and I are both in the prime of our careers and, to make it work, we do our best to equally divide household responsibilities. When I took my week of paternity leave after the birth of our son, I gained higher confidence in my ability to care for our newborn. I learned just how major a role I could play in helping with his daily needs. In addition, my paternity leave gave me the peace of mind to know I would not miss out on income as I supported my wife during our transition to parenthood.”
Tony Nozewski

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“I realized how quickly you bond with your newborn.”

“I started working at Beech-Nut three months prior to the birth of my first son. Otto was born four weeks premature via an emergency C-section, and my wife suffered complications. My week of paternity leave became critical to the wellbeing of my family. The first week I realized how quickly you bond with your newborn and that nothing else in the world matters but his health and safety. It was my first time changing a diaper, first time burping a baby—I never knew there were so many different techniques!—and first time being spit up and peed on.

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“It gave me better appreciation for what it means to be a father.”

“When our first child was born in 2005, Booz Allen was one of the few companies that offered paid paternity leave. The two weeks I spent caring for our daughter after my wife went back to work allowed me to bond with her in ways I couldn’t imagine. It also gave me a better understanding and appreciation for what it means to be a father. The only question about taking paternity leave again in 2008, when our youngest daughter was born, was when to take it—it’s a benefit every father should use.”
Matthew Billingsley
Lead Associate, Media Relations, Booz Allen Hamilton

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“I Was Able to Devote All My Energy and Focus to the Three Most Important People in My Life.”

“Paternity leave gave me the opportunity to work alongside my wife as a team for those first two weeks that our twins were home. This was important just from a workload perspective—two babies is a lot of work! It’s kind of tough to distill it down to one lesson, but I might say that, if not for the paternity leave, I would not have learned to read the babies’ cues as well — for example, the differences between when they’re crying because they’re hungry versus when they’re crying because their diaper is dirty or they’re tired.

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“It wasn’t enough time.”

“I didn’t get formal paid paternity leave; I took all of my sick time and saved vacation time, and got 10 days between helping out with labor and getting home and settled. I learned that wasn’t enough time, and that not being home for the early days has made my presence such a special occasion for our son that it ruins his sleep schedule. I feel like not having paternity leave time was a major factor in my wife having a harder time recovering from the pregnancy, and her feeling of being trapped.

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New Dads: What I Learned On Paternity Leave

New Dads: What I Learned On Paternity Leave

Taking Paternity Leave

“A baby can really change who I am.”

“Any thought that paternity leave would be ‘time off’ was way off.”

“I fully grasped how long it takes to do seemingly simple things.”

“I gained confidence in my ability to care for our newborn.”

“I realized how quickly you bond with your newborn.”

“It gave me better appreciation for what it means to be a father.”

“I Was Able to Devote All My Energy and Focus to the Three Most Important People in My Life.”

“It wasn’t enough time.”

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